Definite Opinions

With amusement, the First Church of Coyote offers the following definition:

SNOWFLAKE (snōˈflāk)


  1. the process by which evaporated coyote urine becomes frozen and drinkable. This occurs through an unknown, completely mysterious process only understood by ‘scientists’, ‘educated adults’ and children 10 and under (but above the age of sentience). Each snowflake is understood to be unique, mostly unique, or quite possibly not too unique if you compare across snowstorms but anyways, they’re pretty diverse.
  2. ‘White’ people, predominantly white males, who for some reason consider their own experience so super-unique it excuses them from genocide, racism, ignorance, empathy or alien abduction.
  3. {archaic} insult folks use against political opponents which supposedly indicates that they maybe need special help? Or consider themselves unique? Honestly, it seems like a lot of psychological projection going on, folks.

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